In 1995, I was struck by an illness that kills 90% of those diagnosed with it within 5 years.
I’m happy to say that, 13 + years later, I’m still here.
I had two choices: claim my victimhood and let the illness have its way with me or fight. I chose to fight.
It would have been much easier to claim victimhood status, file for disability and give in. After all, it’s not my fault. I didn’t do anything wrong. This isn’t a “life-style” disease, like so much cancer is. (You can quite smoking, if you want to.) My heart just got damaged, no one knows exactly how. So, I had the option of giving up and letting life pass me by, ending all too quickly, not with a bang, but a whimper.
I have watched my mother use her (mostly imagined) various illnesses to escape having to live her life. She passed her responsibilities as a mother and housewife on to me when I was only 9 years old. I had adult responsibilities when my greatest worries should have been pop music, school and getting to the mall to be with my friends. She has never recognized what she stole from me nor apologized. I haven’t forgiven her and don’t intend to. Stealing someone’s childhood is an unforgivable crime.
I was diagnosed then my girls were 12 and 8. I could have done the same thing she did and dump my responsibilities onto my eldest daughter. After all, I was far sicker than my mother ever hoped to be. I had the ‘right’ to some rest, right?
Wrong! My kids had a right to a parent who cared about and for them. Not some whiney victim of no use to anybody.
I’m still plugging along. My kids are both grown women now and, hopefully, don’t think too badly of me. I know there were lots of things I didn’t do due to poor health but I tried to keep that to a minimum. No, we never played with that Easy-Bake oven but in later years we baked real cookies together.
I have my regrets, to be sure. I regret ever complaining about having to tuck my younger daughter in for the night upstairs when I was tired. I regret we never got around to making applesauce again before she moved away.
I should have listened to my older daughter sing more before she left home. I gave her lots of space as a teenager. Now, maybe, I think I got too far away.
But, you can’t live your life looking backward, especially when you’re fighting a life-threatening illness. You need to keep that focus forward, to getting better day-by-day, getting stronger.
On that note, I carried in 4 bags of groceries last night, including 5 lbs of potatoes and 3 lbs of onions! Progress!! :-D
Now, if I could only get some of my stamina back, I’d really have something!
And you have to keep remembering that you have no alternative. Victimhood, while it may seem easier in the short term, only causes more problems in the long term. If I don’t get up every morning and go to work, who’s going to make my house and car payments? The government? Hah! Not likely. There’s me and only me to look after me. There’s no giving up and giving in. Hard but true.
Wednesday, January 30, 2008
Saturday, January 26, 2008
Blacks and Muslims
Well, for once, the young, black guys in a scene in TV aren’t the villains; they’re helping the victim of a stabbing, chasing off the bad guys and calling the cops. All too often, young, black men on television in cop shows are portrayed as the bad guys: murder, drugs, beating people up.
I get so tired of that. Not all black men are criminals. All too many of them are but maybe if they could be represented against type more often, other young men might see they have more of a choice about their lives.
I also get tired of the “big, bad Christian” meme in the whodunit shows. These villains are always particularly creepy. Why is that? How many Christians do you know that have committed murder? Most of them are fairly nice people, although some can be insufferable if you get trapped talking about religion, but that can be avoided.
When TV accurately portrays the adherents of Islam in all their barbarity, them they might have something!
But they’re too chicken for that!
Nah, peaceful Christians are the ones who get their symbols dipped in urine and smeared with dung. They won’t riot or issue death threats.
Cowards!
If these “arteests” really wanted to push the envelope, they’d do the same to Islamic symbols. That would be brave.
I get so tired of that. Not all black men are criminals. All too many of them are but maybe if they could be represented against type more often, other young men might see they have more of a choice about their lives.
I also get tired of the “big, bad Christian” meme in the whodunit shows. These villains are always particularly creepy. Why is that? How many Christians do you know that have committed murder? Most of them are fairly nice people, although some can be insufferable if you get trapped talking about religion, but that can be avoided.
When TV accurately portrays the adherents of Islam in all their barbarity, them they might have something!
But they’re too chicken for that!
Nah, peaceful Christians are the ones who get their symbols dipped in urine and smeared with dung. They won’t riot or issue death threats.
Cowards!
If these “arteests” really wanted to push the envelope, they’d do the same to Islamic symbols. That would be brave.
Monday, January 07, 2008
The Fair Tax.
23% national sales tax instead of a 14.8% federal tax rate. I already pay 7.75% county/state sales tax. By eliminating the IRS, Social Security and Medicare taxes, I get to keep 37% more of my income.
So, for a 15.25% increase in my sales taxes, I get to keep 37% more of my own money. And I get a pre-bate of a certain amount every month!
Sounds good to me!
Where do I sign up?
(Ok. Even if the 23% is in addition to the 7.75%, I’m still ahead!)
Of course, for this to happen, Congress will have to get off its collective ass and repeal the 16th Amendment. They can’t even pass a budget!
So, it’s a good idea but I’m not holding my breath.
So, for a 15.25% increase in my sales taxes, I get to keep 37% more of my own money. And I get a pre-bate of a certain amount every month!
Sounds good to me!
Where do I sign up?
(Ok. Even if the 23% is in addition to the 7.75%, I’m still ahead!)
Of course, for this to happen, Congress will have to get off its collective ass and repeal the 16th Amendment. They can’t even pass a budget!
So, it’s a good idea but I’m not holding my breath.
Change?
First it was Obama, then it was Hillary, now it’s Mitt.
Everyone wants to be the Candidate of Change.
But they never expressly say what they want to change! Their minds, their tires, their underwear? What?
Yeah, I’m for “change”, too. Dimes, nickels, quarters, I like it all! Heck, I even bend over and pick up pennies I see on the sidewalk! It all adds up.
It’s amazing to me that your average idiot voter is falling for this BS.
Most people are horrible when dealing with change. Move their cheese (haven’t we all read that horrid, little book?) and they become totally discombobulated! Can’t function. Can’t think.
I want some specifics about who’s going to change what. As far as I’ve been able to figure out, both Hillary and Obama want to change us to a more socialist economy with central planning. Didn’t the Soviets prove rather decidedly that that concept doesn’t work all that well?
I don’t know enough about Mitt’s positions, yet, to know what he thinks needs changed. Hopefully, he’ll read The Fair Tax, fall in love with the idea, and we’ll get someone I could actually vote for promoting the idea. Yeah, change the IRS right out of existence!
Wonderful idea!!
Everyone wants to be the Candidate of Change.
But they never expressly say what they want to change! Their minds, their tires, their underwear? What?
Yeah, I’m for “change”, too. Dimes, nickels, quarters, I like it all! Heck, I even bend over and pick up pennies I see on the sidewalk! It all adds up.
It’s amazing to me that your average idiot voter is falling for this BS.
Most people are horrible when dealing with change. Move their cheese (haven’t we all read that horrid, little book?) and they become totally discombobulated! Can’t function. Can’t think.
I want some specifics about who’s going to change what. As far as I’ve been able to figure out, both Hillary and Obama want to change us to a more socialist economy with central planning. Didn’t the Soviets prove rather decidedly that that concept doesn’t work all that well?
I don’t know enough about Mitt’s positions, yet, to know what he thinks needs changed. Hopefully, he’ll read The Fair Tax, fall in love with the idea, and we’ll get someone I could actually vote for promoting the idea. Yeah, change the IRS right out of existence!
Wonderful idea!!
Thursday, January 03, 2008
I really despise advertising!
For some reason, car commercials seem to be the most annoying. The recent Toyota campaign, where drivers do horrible things to their cars so that they have an excuse to buy a new Toyota, really bugs me.
Apparently, Toyota driver wanna-bees are so stupid that they destroy their trade-ins instead of just trading them in.
I got news for you, Toyota, this is America. We don’t need an excuse or a reason to buy a new car. “I want one.” is sufficient here. We don’t need to wreck our current car to buy a new one!
Quit treating us like we’re all a bunch of dummies! Just tell about your products in a respectful way.
Apparently, Toyota driver wanna-bees are so stupid that they destroy their trade-ins instead of just trading them in.
I got news for you, Toyota, this is America. We don’t need an excuse or a reason to buy a new car. “I want one.” is sufficient here. We don’t need to wreck our current car to buy a new one!
Quit treating us like we’re all a bunch of dummies! Just tell about your products in a respectful way.
Friday, November 16, 2007
I Miss My Friend
My best friend moved to England.
I’ve known her over 5 years. I met her when I joined a small company with offices all the way across town. 1 hour commute, every day, minimum. They have any trouble on the 480 bridge and it’s and hour and a half, both ways. By coincidence, she also lived in the same small community on the west side that I did, and her birthday is the day before mine! We got along famously!
Noel is the only person I have ever met who is virtually un-offendable. She knows that anything I say to her, I mean it in a friendly manner. She never takes anything I say, no matter how outrageous, the wrong way. Not that she isn’t just as opinionated as I am! Oh, no! We’ve had some good arguments, mostly over politics. We agree on most things but where we disagree, fireworks! (She tends to yell when she gets excited!)
After working together for about 5 months, I decided that the company and I weren’t going to work out and found another job. We stayed in touch, kinda, for the next year or so but I realized that we weren’t going to stay friends if we never saw each other. I called her and proposed that we start getting together regularly for dinner. Give us a chance to stay up on each other’s lives.
So, we got together every Wednesday for almost 2 years. And I got to hear the Saga of Matt and Noel.
Noel has had a life that makes even the most melodramatic soap opera seem tame and boring by comparison.
When I met her, she professed to being gay and was living with another woman. 2 years later, they had broken up and Noel was all in a tizzy about her upcoming vacation to Spain to meet a man she had known online for several years.
She married him last July.
In between, she reignited an old relationship with the man who fathered her son. He (and his family) traumatized her so badly that she “switched teams” and was a lesbian for 18 years. (That is according to her.)
I got to hear all the gory details every Wednesday night over dinner. I dubbed it “The Saga of Matt and Noel” and looked forward to hearing the latest installment every week.
They simply had too much hurt and time between them and the relationship failed a second time, but they gave it their best shot. I don’t think she could ever really totally forgive him for what went before and I don’t think he ever really believed that his parents behaved as badly as she said they did. It was doomed from the start.
But it was fun to hear about every week! What new, atrociously stupid thing would Matt say? How would Noel over-react?
At least they mostly kept their now-grown son out of it.
And I got to air my problems, as well. There’s nothing like being able to talk a problem over with a trusted friend who won’t be offended or judgmental about what you might say. Noel is the only person like that I’ve ever had in my life and I miss her terribly.
Now, I have no one to say, “Hey! Guess what stupid thing I did?” and have her laugh _with_ me not _at_ me. My SO will laugh at me and be critical. For, as wonderful as he is in so many ways, he is a very critical person. It is best not to give him too many opportunities. Or ammunition.
So, I started a blog. And a private diary. No one reads either but at least it keeps me writing and thinking about writing. I have several half-written books on my computer and several typed up story outlines that need finished. Maybe one day I’ll find the discipline to actually finish something.
And you, Dear Reader, can say you knew me when… :-)
I’ve known her over 5 years. I met her when I joined a small company with offices all the way across town. 1 hour commute, every day, minimum. They have any trouble on the 480 bridge and it’s and hour and a half, both ways. By coincidence, she also lived in the same small community on the west side that I did, and her birthday is the day before mine! We got along famously!
Noel is the only person I have ever met who is virtually un-offendable. She knows that anything I say to her, I mean it in a friendly manner. She never takes anything I say, no matter how outrageous, the wrong way. Not that she isn’t just as opinionated as I am! Oh, no! We’ve had some good arguments, mostly over politics. We agree on most things but where we disagree, fireworks! (She tends to yell when she gets excited!)
After working together for about 5 months, I decided that the company and I weren’t going to work out and found another job. We stayed in touch, kinda, for the next year or so but I realized that we weren’t going to stay friends if we never saw each other. I called her and proposed that we start getting together regularly for dinner. Give us a chance to stay up on each other’s lives.
So, we got together every Wednesday for almost 2 years. And I got to hear the Saga of Matt and Noel.
Noel has had a life that makes even the most melodramatic soap opera seem tame and boring by comparison.
When I met her, she professed to being gay and was living with another woman. 2 years later, they had broken up and Noel was all in a tizzy about her upcoming vacation to Spain to meet a man she had known online for several years.
She married him last July.
In between, she reignited an old relationship with the man who fathered her son. He (and his family) traumatized her so badly that she “switched teams” and was a lesbian for 18 years. (That is according to her.)
I got to hear all the gory details every Wednesday night over dinner. I dubbed it “The Saga of Matt and Noel” and looked forward to hearing the latest installment every week.
They simply had too much hurt and time between them and the relationship failed a second time, but they gave it their best shot. I don’t think she could ever really totally forgive him for what went before and I don’t think he ever really believed that his parents behaved as badly as she said they did. It was doomed from the start.
But it was fun to hear about every week! What new, atrociously stupid thing would Matt say? How would Noel over-react?
At least they mostly kept their now-grown son out of it.
And I got to air my problems, as well. There’s nothing like being able to talk a problem over with a trusted friend who won’t be offended or judgmental about what you might say. Noel is the only person like that I’ve ever had in my life and I miss her terribly.
Now, I have no one to say, “Hey! Guess what stupid thing I did?” and have her laugh _with_ me not _at_ me. My SO will laugh at me and be critical. For, as wonderful as he is in so many ways, he is a very critical person. It is best not to give him too many opportunities. Or ammunition.
So, I started a blog. And a private diary. No one reads either but at least it keeps me writing and thinking about writing. I have several half-written books on my computer and several typed up story outlines that need finished. Maybe one day I’ll find the discipline to actually finish something.
And you, Dear Reader, can say you knew me when… :-)
Friday, November 09, 2007
Jimmy 1; Dick 0
Whose more dangerous with a gun, Dick Chaney or Jimmy Carter?
CARTER!
http://emptyage.honan.net/mth/2007/11/jimmy-carter-he.html
Unbelieveable! He took a pot-shot at a relative's pet and killed it!
I'd go hunting with Mr Chaney any day over allowing Jimmeh any where near my kitties!
Especially since Mr. Chaney only shoots elderly lawyers, neither of which I am! LOL
Poor kitty!
What an Asshole!!
CARTER!
http://emptyage.honan.net/mth/2007/11/jimmy-carter-he.html
Unbelieveable! He took a pot-shot at a relative's pet and killed it!
I'd go hunting with Mr Chaney any day over allowing Jimmeh any where near my kitties!
Especially since Mr. Chaney only shoots elderly lawyers, neither of which I am! LOL
Poor kitty!
What an Asshole!!
Thursday, November 08, 2007
War, What is it good for?
This!
http://www.usatoday.com/news/health/2007-11-04-afghanistanhealth_N.htm
90,000 children. Mind boggling!
Yay, US!!
http://www.usatoday.com/news/health/2007-11-04-afghanistanhealth_N.htm
"Close to 90,000 children who would have died before age 5 in Afghanistan
during Taliban rule will stay alive this year because of advances in medical
care in the country, Afghan President Hamid Karzai said Sunday.
The
under-5
child mortality rate in Afghanistan has declined from an estimated
257 deaths
per 1,000 live births in 2001 to about 191 per 1,000 in 2006, the
Ministry of
Public Health said, relying on a new study by Johns Hopkins
University.
The
U.N. and aid agency Save the Children both hailed the
advances in health care in
Afghanistan.
"This is certainly very positive
news," said the U.N. spokesman
in Afghanistan, Adrian Edwards. "To come from
such low life expectancy to see
this improvement does appear to be an
indication that the work on the health
sector here is beginning to pay
off."
Karzai, surrounded by children at a
news conference in Kabul,
thanked international aid organizations and Afghan
health workers for the
work they've done to raise health standards. He said
89,000 children will be
saved each year because of the improved health
care."
Wow! Think about those 90,000 kids who would have died the next time you hear a Dhimmocrat whine about the War on Islamofacism.
90,000 children. Mind boggling!
Yay, US!!
Tuesday, November 06, 2007
Getting hit with the STUPID stick!
On Judge Judy today, there was this guy who maintained the they purchased a plane ticket in July for his ex-girlfriend’s grandfather’s funeral in September. The guy simply never understood why Judge Judy had a problem with that!
LOL!!
The guy seems to have been beaten with the Stupid Stick!
My SO and I love Judge Judy! It’s a great example of how NOT to conduct your life and personal affairs! Never have a joint checking account, with anyone. Never loan anyone money without a written contract for repayment. Never live with anyone without having the arrangements in writing. Never get anyone a cell phone in your name, you will never get them to pay the bill.
Great life lessons.
And you get to laugh at really stupid people!
My life is so much better than all of these people! I’ve made some serious mistakes in my life but nothing as down right dumb as the people on this show. They make me look like a freaking genius!
LOL!!
The guy seems to have been beaten with the Stupid Stick!
My SO and I love Judge Judy! It’s a great example of how NOT to conduct your life and personal affairs! Never have a joint checking account, with anyone. Never loan anyone money without a written contract for repayment. Never live with anyone without having the arrangements in writing. Never get anyone a cell phone in your name, you will never get them to pay the bill.
Great life lessons.
And you get to laugh at really stupid people!
My life is so much better than all of these people! I’ve made some serious mistakes in my life but nothing as down right dumb as the people on this show. They make me look like a freaking genius!
Friday, November 02, 2007
Spam
Ok, I’m used to and get great amusement from the spam emails I get offering to enhance body parts I don’t have and I just delete the pump-and-dump stock tips, but since when did marijuana dealers get so bold?
The latest, newest spam is offering to sell me “really great shit”!! It claims to be legal but calls the product by several pseudonyms for pot.
Whatever will they think of next??
The latest, newest spam is offering to sell me “really great shit”!! It claims to be legal but calls the product by several pseudonyms for pot.
Whatever will they think of next??
Wednesday, October 31, 2007
I'm so proud!
My congressional representative, Dennis Kucinich, declared on national TV lat night that he did, in fact, see a UFO.
What a total nutjob!
Maybe now the idiots on the west side of Cleveland will see this guy for the silly person that he is!
I sincerely hope someone runs against him in the next election! I wouldn’t vote this guy dog catcher! What on Earth is he doing in Congress? And how can he ever be taken as a serious candidate for president? Why isn’t he laughed off the national and local stage? He’s obviously crazy!
What a total nutjob!
Maybe now the idiots on the west side of Cleveland will see this guy for the silly person that he is!
I sincerely hope someone runs against him in the next election! I wouldn’t vote this guy dog catcher! What on Earth is he doing in Congress? And how can he ever be taken as a serious candidate for president? Why isn’t he laughed off the national and local stage? He’s obviously crazy!
That's a good question!!
Question asked by a caller to a local talk-show host:
If an Illegal Alien is an “undocumented worker”, does that make a drug dealer an “unlicensed pharmacist”??
LOL
Good question! Why do we constantly have to deal in euphemisms when it comes to serious, national issues? What dream world do the people who talk this way live in, anyway? It’s not the real world, where the rest of us live.
Giving a serious problem a kinder, gentler name won’t help the problem go away! It only helps avoiding having to deal with it, which, I guess, is the point. If we pretend long enough and hard enough, our magical thinking will make everything better.
Eventually of course, euphemisms take on the original meanings of the terms they replaced. So, what’s the point? Call things by their real names; be accurate in descriptions!
If an Illegal Alien is an “undocumented worker”, does that make a drug dealer an “unlicensed pharmacist”??
LOL
Good question! Why do we constantly have to deal in euphemisms when it comes to serious, national issues? What dream world do the people who talk this way live in, anyway? It’s not the real world, where the rest of us live.
Giving a serious problem a kinder, gentler name won’t help the problem go away! It only helps avoiding having to deal with it, which, I guess, is the point. If we pretend long enough and hard enough, our magical thinking will make everything better.
Eventually of course, euphemisms take on the original meanings of the terms they replaced. So, what’s the point? Call things by their real names; be accurate in descriptions!
Monday, October 29, 2007
I Hate Snoring!!!
My SO woke me up from a sound sleep Saturday night with his snoring. He was making so much noise both on the in and out breath, it was like trying to sleep with a running lawn mower in the room!
Ok, not that loud but the level of constant noise was the same. I snuck off and tried to sleep in our spare room for a while but I let too much air out of the Select Comfort bed in that room and wound up trying to sleep on the decking. Not too comfy! So, in the end, I went back to my warm, cushy bed and went back to sleep.
I had to kick both cats off the bed before I could lie back down. I had expected that they would come looking for me eventually but I guess the warmth of the electric blanket won out over time snuggling with Mom! Ingrates! They love me only for my body heat!
And I feed them, too.
I suggested to the SO that he go to a doctor and see about reducing the amount of noise he makes while he is asleep. He won’t do so, of course. He won’t go to a doctor when he is in pain! He’s eventually going to end up sleeping in another room, though. I cannot go to work everyday if I can’t get enough sleep!
How selfish does one have to be to continue interrupting someone else’s sleep and never do anything about it?? There’s a sleep clinic around here not too far that I’ve heard about. And his insurance would pay for it! It can’t be a good thing that he stops breathing at night! But he won’t hear about doing anything about this! Gets mad if I mention it!
Don’t get me wrong, he’s a great guy, just goofy about doctors. If I were that way, I’d be DEAD!!
Pity he doesn’t see the point!
Ok, not that loud but the level of constant noise was the same. I snuck off and tried to sleep in our spare room for a while but I let too much air out of the Select Comfort bed in that room and wound up trying to sleep on the decking. Not too comfy! So, in the end, I went back to my warm, cushy bed and went back to sleep.
I had to kick both cats off the bed before I could lie back down. I had expected that they would come looking for me eventually but I guess the warmth of the electric blanket won out over time snuggling with Mom! Ingrates! They love me only for my body heat!
And I feed them, too.
I suggested to the SO that he go to a doctor and see about reducing the amount of noise he makes while he is asleep. He won’t do so, of course. He won’t go to a doctor when he is in pain! He’s eventually going to end up sleeping in another room, though. I cannot go to work everyday if I can’t get enough sleep!
How selfish does one have to be to continue interrupting someone else’s sleep and never do anything about it?? There’s a sleep clinic around here not too far that I’ve heard about. And his insurance would pay for it! It can’t be a good thing that he stops breathing at night! But he won’t hear about doing anything about this! Gets mad if I mention it!
Don’t get me wrong, he’s a great guy, just goofy about doctors. If I were that way, I’d be DEAD!!
Pity he doesn’t see the point!
Saturday, October 13, 2007
Health
I whine a lot here about being tired and not feeling well so I thought I let you know what exactly ails me.
I have dilated, idiopathic cardiomyopathy. Google that last word if you don’t know what it means.
Really scary!!
The term "idiopathic" means that the cause is unknown. No one knows why I have this problem, much less how to fix it.
Basically, this is what you have when you get a heart transplant, making the cure worse than the disease, in my opinion.
Here’s a good explanation:
http://www.cardiomyopathy.org/index.php?id=48
It’s a site from the UK but contains good definitions. Read ‘Ejection Fraction’.
I’ve been told by my doctors that a normal EF is 55 to 70%. Mine is 20%. Last December, when I felt like I was dying, it was <10%. I got a pace maker/defibulator implanted in January (We are the Borg! You will be assimilated!) and my EF has doubled since then. It’s twice what it was but still piss-poor.
As a result of all this, I can no longer do many, many things I enjoy: hiking, camping, dancing, taking a walk, nor many things I didn’t enjoy: house-work, shopping.
So, my house is a mess most of the time. I scrubbed my kitchen floor last weekend and it took ALL DAY!! I’d work for a few minutes, til I got out of breath, then sit for a little while, then work for a few more minutes, then sit some more. And this is with the nice FloorMate my SO bought me last year! I can’t even begin to scrub a floor by hand!
And I work full-time, as well. Some weekends, I don’t get out of bed til almost 11:00am! And my brother gives me a hard time about it, too.
Most people don’t ‘get’ it. Fortunately for me, my kids and my SO do and don’t expect me to be able to do things ‘normal’ people can do. I can’t even take a shower as often as I would like! I take 1 a week because it exhausts me so.
And I get NO exersize, so I’m overweight as well. Not something I’m pleased about, believe me! And the beta-blockers I’m on make me gain more weight. Lose-lose-lose. Everything except weight! L
If you’ve ever read Little Women, what I have is what killed Beth. It took her years to die after scarlet fever damaged her heart. That would have been me if not for modern medicine.
I have dilated, idiopathic cardiomyopathy. Google that last word if you don’t know what it means.
Really scary!!
The term "idiopathic" means that the cause is unknown. No one knows why I have this problem, much less how to fix it.
Basically, this is what you have when you get a heart transplant, making the cure worse than the disease, in my opinion.
Here’s a good explanation:
http://www.cardiomyopathy.org/index.php?id=48
It’s a site from the UK but contains good definitions. Read ‘Ejection Fraction’.
I’ve been told by my doctors that a normal EF is 55 to 70%. Mine is 20%. Last December, when I felt like I was dying, it was <10%. I got a pace maker/defibulator implanted in January (We are the Borg! You will be assimilated!) and my EF has doubled since then. It’s twice what it was but still piss-poor.
As a result of all this, I can no longer do many, many things I enjoy: hiking, camping, dancing, taking a walk, nor many things I didn’t enjoy: house-work, shopping.
So, my house is a mess most of the time. I scrubbed my kitchen floor last weekend and it took ALL DAY!! I’d work for a few minutes, til I got out of breath, then sit for a little while, then work for a few more minutes, then sit some more. And this is with the nice FloorMate my SO bought me last year! I can’t even begin to scrub a floor by hand!
And I work full-time, as well. Some weekends, I don’t get out of bed til almost 11:00am! And my brother gives me a hard time about it, too.
Most people don’t ‘get’ it. Fortunately for me, my kids and my SO do and don’t expect me to be able to do things ‘normal’ people can do. I can’t even take a shower as often as I would like! I take 1 a week because it exhausts me so.
And I get NO exersize, so I’m overweight as well. Not something I’m pleased about, believe me! And the beta-blockers I’m on make me gain more weight. Lose-lose-lose. Everything except weight! L
If you’ve ever read Little Women, what I have is what killed Beth. It took her years to die after scarlet fever damaged her heart. That would have been me if not for modern medicine.
Wednesday, October 10, 2007
Midges and Baseball
Hey, Chamberlain:
Midges don’t bite!!
They may look like mosquitoes but they don’t act like them. Worst you’re going to get from midge swarms is a creepy-crawly sensation.
I guess they don’t have insects in New York, do they? Never had to contend with pests living there, huh?
Whiney buncha a-holes! Blaming their loss on some poor, little bugs!
:-)
Gee, does this make us the Israelites and the Yankees Pharaohs’ Egypt?? If so, then don’t we have 6 more plagues to go?
Boston, brace yourselves!! :-D
Midges don’t bite!!
They may look like mosquitoes but they don’t act like them. Worst you’re going to get from midge swarms is a creepy-crawly sensation.
I guess they don’t have insects in New York, do they? Never had to contend with pests living there, huh?
Whiney buncha a-holes! Blaming their loss on some poor, little bugs!
:-)
Gee, does this make us the Israelites and the Yankees Pharaohs’ Egypt?? If so, then don’t we have 6 more plagues to go?
Boston, brace yourselves!! :-D
Monday, October 08, 2007
I hate commercials!
So many of them assume I’m an idiot and talk down to me in a particularly annoying manner. The really annoying ones I make a point to never buy those products! If I’m such an idiot then I’m too stupid to buy their junk!
Sugardale hotdogs has a really annoying commercial on the radio during the Indians’ games. The one woman is fretting over how many hot dogs to buy for their upcoming get together. Her friend assumes she worried about not having enough because her husband ate some large number during the last Dollar Dog night. That would even be sensible, given what a pig the husband is but, No! She’s worried about having too many! She never knows what to do with the left-overs.
Sugardale to the rescue: they have a re-closable package. Whew!
Apparently, no one at their ad agency has heard of Zip-Lock bags. That’s what I keep hot dogs in, anyway. I buy them by the 5 pound package at Sam’s Club and hope for left-overs!
The Ford commercials are also especially annoying. “Have you driven a Ford?!?” they yell at me both from my TV and my radio. Yes, twice a day, thank you. Stop yelling at me!!
I’m glad they didn’t start this ad campaign while I was looking for a car! I would really have had a problem buying my little Focus. I love my little high-mileage econo-box. (Rush Limbaugh reference)
It’s really a fun, cute little car. Exactly what I wanted to replace the huge pregnant-roller-skate of a minivan. Fun to drive, easy to park, quick and zippy.
I know I’m not in the advertisers demographic for most of the shows I watch. The only shows I watch live are sports: baseball and football. I’m not interested in buying a car and I don’t drink beer so most of the ads aren’t aimed at me. Especially football. Those advertisers really assume that their entire audience is male!! And they all drink beer and are in the market for a new car.
And have Erectile Dysfunction! :-) Definitely not aimed at me!
Just like most of my junk email. Either for drugs I don’t need, pump-and-dump stock tips or offers to enhance body-parts I don’t have. Some of those are really funny! Obviously written by a non-English-speaker with a whatever/English phrase book. And none too clear on the concept of what they’re trying to say in English!! LOL!!!
Sugardale hotdogs has a really annoying commercial on the radio during the Indians’ games. The one woman is fretting over how many hot dogs to buy for their upcoming get together. Her friend assumes she worried about not having enough because her husband ate some large number during the last Dollar Dog night. That would even be sensible, given what a pig the husband is but, No! She’s worried about having too many! She never knows what to do with the left-overs.
Sugardale to the rescue: they have a re-closable package. Whew!
Apparently, no one at their ad agency has heard of Zip-Lock bags. That’s what I keep hot dogs in, anyway. I buy them by the 5 pound package at Sam’s Club and hope for left-overs!
The Ford commercials are also especially annoying. “Have you driven a Ford?!?” they yell at me both from my TV and my radio. Yes, twice a day, thank you. Stop yelling at me!!
I’m glad they didn’t start this ad campaign while I was looking for a car! I would really have had a problem buying my little Focus. I love my little high-mileage econo-box. (Rush Limbaugh reference)
It’s really a fun, cute little car. Exactly what I wanted to replace the huge pregnant-roller-skate of a minivan. Fun to drive, easy to park, quick and zippy.
I know I’m not in the advertisers demographic for most of the shows I watch. The only shows I watch live are sports: baseball and football. I’m not interested in buying a car and I don’t drink beer so most of the ads aren’t aimed at me. Especially football. Those advertisers really assume that their entire audience is male!! And they all drink beer and are in the market for a new car.
And have Erectile Dysfunction! :-) Definitely not aimed at me!
Just like most of my junk email. Either for drugs I don’t need, pump-and-dump stock tips or offers to enhance body-parts I don’t have. Some of those are really funny! Obviously written by a non-English-speaker with a whatever/English phrase book. And none too clear on the concept of what they’re trying to say in English!! LOL!!!
Self-Employment
I’d love to be my own boss!! I’ve worked from home several times and actually end up working more hours, just the hours are of my choice. I’m not really good for much before 9:00 and yet they insist on having me at my desk at 8:00, where I mostly just sit and stare into space, trying to wake up. In the long run, you get more work out of me if you let me set my own hours. But, then, I suppose that’s true for most people.
Two years ago, I tried to start my own business. I make jewelry: www.treasuresbynora.com. I did craft shows that entire year. I still owe money on my credit card from that little venture. And have thousands of beads in a really nice bead case I bought. At least I didn’t pay retail for any of that stuff. Since then, silver prices have gone through the roof!!
Craft shows are a good way to work very hard, be out in the weather all day and not make very much money. People don’t seem to go to shows to actually buy anything. If it’s a festival of some kind, they’re there for the festival, not to acquire things. If it’s a Christmas gift show, chances are that there are 25 other jewelers there, some of whom are flouting the rules and reselling junk they imported from China. Fair competition is one thing but I can’t compete with China! People who put together shows and have 25 jewelers are doing everyone concerned a huge disfavor. No one will sell much, and when they don’t enforce their jury rules, those of us who actually made our own wares will leave angry and never do that show again. There are several shows on my Never Do Again list because of this. Promoters need to have a balance of types of venders and to go by their own rules. If the show is juried and all vendors are supposed to sell stuff hand-made by them, imported junk from China shouldn’t be allowed!!!
Unfortunately, most shows don’t seem to realize that by allowing imported junk, they are undermining their credibility with both their vendors and the buying public. Back when I used to go to craft shows as a buyer, not a seller, I hated it when I’d get there, pay the admission price and discover that, even though the show had been billed as all hand-made, most of the stuff was imported junk. Those shows I never attended again. Even shows I attended again, I avoided those vendors as unreliable. Putting out imported junk out like they made it! Like I couldn’t tell the difference! Liars!!
It was dishonest, which was my real problem with it. What else were they lying about?? Once you break trust with someone, it’s very hard to reestablish it!
Maybe I’ll do some more shows next year. Only problem with that is that I gave my van that I transport my tent and 8’ table in to my daughter. The new SUV cant’ accommodate the 8’ table. My SO offered to buy me a folding 8’ table when he wanted this particular SUV so I may take him up on his offer. He also works very hard when we do a show. He’s in charge of “Logistics”: moving heavy objects, setting up the tent, setting up the table, etc. Due to my poor health, I really can’t help him much. I can grab one side of the tent and pull but I can’t snap the locks into place; I’m simply not strong enough. So, he does most of the physical labor by himself. I arrange jewelry on the displays after everything is set up. He even helps me with that! I really couldn’t do it without him!
I’ve done a few indoor shows where they provided a table and all I had to do was set up my displays by myself, especially in the beginning, but now I wouldn’t dream of doing show without him. He’s also good company, giving me someone to talk to when the crowds are thin. He has the most biting observations on shows and the people who attend them! Really funny!
Our usual after-show drink at dinner is a Pina Colada. Red Lobster makes the best ones! Give it a try sometime! :-)
Two years ago, I tried to start my own business. I make jewelry: www.treasuresbynora.com. I did craft shows that entire year. I still owe money on my credit card from that little venture. And have thousands of beads in a really nice bead case I bought. At least I didn’t pay retail for any of that stuff. Since then, silver prices have gone through the roof!!
Craft shows are a good way to work very hard, be out in the weather all day and not make very much money. People don’t seem to go to shows to actually buy anything. If it’s a festival of some kind, they’re there for the festival, not to acquire things. If it’s a Christmas gift show, chances are that there are 25 other jewelers there, some of whom are flouting the rules and reselling junk they imported from China. Fair competition is one thing but I can’t compete with China! People who put together shows and have 25 jewelers are doing everyone concerned a huge disfavor. No one will sell much, and when they don’t enforce their jury rules, those of us who actually made our own wares will leave angry and never do that show again. There are several shows on my Never Do Again list because of this. Promoters need to have a balance of types of venders and to go by their own rules. If the show is juried and all vendors are supposed to sell stuff hand-made by them, imported junk from China shouldn’t be allowed!!!
Unfortunately, most shows don’t seem to realize that by allowing imported junk, they are undermining their credibility with both their vendors and the buying public. Back when I used to go to craft shows as a buyer, not a seller, I hated it when I’d get there, pay the admission price and discover that, even though the show had been billed as all hand-made, most of the stuff was imported junk. Those shows I never attended again. Even shows I attended again, I avoided those vendors as unreliable. Putting out imported junk out like they made it! Like I couldn’t tell the difference! Liars!!
It was dishonest, which was my real problem with it. What else were they lying about?? Once you break trust with someone, it’s very hard to reestablish it!
Maybe I’ll do some more shows next year. Only problem with that is that I gave my van that I transport my tent and 8’ table in to my daughter. The new SUV cant’ accommodate the 8’ table. My SO offered to buy me a folding 8’ table when he wanted this particular SUV so I may take him up on his offer. He also works very hard when we do a show. He’s in charge of “Logistics”: moving heavy objects, setting up the tent, setting up the table, etc. Due to my poor health, I really can’t help him much. I can grab one side of the tent and pull but I can’t snap the locks into place; I’m simply not strong enough. So, he does most of the physical labor by himself. I arrange jewelry on the displays after everything is set up. He even helps me with that! I really couldn’t do it without him!
I’ve done a few indoor shows where they provided a table and all I had to do was set up my displays by myself, especially in the beginning, but now I wouldn’t dream of doing show without him. He’s also good company, giving me someone to talk to when the crowds are thin. He has the most biting observations on shows and the people who attend them! Really funny!
Our usual after-show drink at dinner is a Pina Colada. Red Lobster makes the best ones! Give it a try sometime! :-)
Sunday, October 07, 2007
The Birds
When I got up this morning, the back yard was covered in Starlings. There are two 60 foot maples at the rear of the yard. They were crowded with black birds.
And that many birds make an incredible amount of NOISE!!!
My neighbor has a ringer on the outside of his house that alerts him, and the entire neighborhood, when his phone rings. They got a call and a large majority of the birds took off, yelling and screeching. What a racket!
The remainder hung around for another 15 minutes or so before finally joining the rest of the flock down the block. I can still hear them!
The cats weren’t too interested. I watched the birds more than they did. Cookie just wanted to be petted and Klein licked himself, again. I wonder what he’s allergic to??
Cookie is allergic to corn. Try and find a cat food without corn in it! ALL the major brands, including the expensive ones, have corn in them. And she will scratch and chew herself bloody if she eats any of them.
I found some at Pets Mart that she seems to tolerate OK. It’s $18.99 for 12lbs, though. Purina is $8.99 for 25lbs! So, this stuff is very expensive. I’ve looked online and everything she might be able to eat is even more expensive. After the Pet-Food-from-China-is-killing-our-pets-scare, I considered making my own, but I really don’t have the energy. I barely have the wherewithal to cook for us every day!! I can’t see adding cooking cat food to my list of chores as well!!
There are some great pet foods out there but most of the cat food seems to have fish in them. Fish makes my cats puke! They do enough of that as it is! I sent away for some samples and they loved it but then they puked all over the house for the next week so I won’t be doing that!! Too bad. It was very healthy and didn’t use any ingredients from China.
Just fish for puking…
Yech!
And that many birds make an incredible amount of NOISE!!!
My neighbor has a ringer on the outside of his house that alerts him, and the entire neighborhood, when his phone rings. They got a call and a large majority of the birds took off, yelling and screeching. What a racket!
The remainder hung around for another 15 minutes or so before finally joining the rest of the flock down the block. I can still hear them!
The cats weren’t too interested. I watched the birds more than they did. Cookie just wanted to be petted and Klein licked himself, again. I wonder what he’s allergic to??
Cookie is allergic to corn. Try and find a cat food without corn in it! ALL the major brands, including the expensive ones, have corn in them. And she will scratch and chew herself bloody if she eats any of them.
I found some at Pets Mart that she seems to tolerate OK. It’s $18.99 for 12lbs, though. Purina is $8.99 for 25lbs! So, this stuff is very expensive. I’ve looked online and everything she might be able to eat is even more expensive. After the Pet-Food-from-China-is-killing-our-pets-scare, I considered making my own, but I really don’t have the energy. I barely have the wherewithal to cook for us every day!! I can’t see adding cooking cat food to my list of chores as well!!
There are some great pet foods out there but most of the cat food seems to have fish in them. Fish makes my cats puke! They do enough of that as it is! I sent away for some samples and they loved it but then they puked all over the house for the next week so I won’t be doing that!! Too bad. It was very healthy and didn’t use any ingredients from China.
Just fish for puking…
Yech!
Thursday, October 04, 2007
Cats
My cats think I’m crazy!
They’re probably right. After all, who gets up at the crack of dawn to go sit in an office all day to earn money for cat food (and other things!) and who gets to stay home and sleep all day?? If life were fair, it would be the other way around!
But, who said life was fair? I don’t even like that word. It’s the ultimate whine from spoiled children who aren’t getting their way; “No fair!” I always asked them to explain their frame of reference, not letting them get away with simply stating that they wanted their way in something. Why was their way better than mine? Explain yourself!! Who says?
Anyway, back to the cats…
Cookie and Klein (named by children, is case you couldn’t tell!), get a can of cat food every night before I go to bed. As a result, Cookie won’t let me out of her sight unless and until they are fed. I’ve gone to bed early a couple of time without feeding them and she’s never forgotten it, nor forgiven me. So, if I leave the kitchen, she follows me. If I go upstairs, she follows me and gives me that “Mommy doesn’t love me anymore” look until I go back downstairs. Or she panics and tries to block me from going up the stairs. Of course, I’m probably just going to get something and step right over her. A 12 lb. cat just isn’t capable of physically blocking my path to any great degree. Or I step on her, resulting in much yelling and hurt looks and apologies from me, even though it was her that got in my way.
So, any place I go in my house in the evenings after dinner requires a 2 cat entourage, just to make sure that I don’t get away without feeding them their treat. They also can’t figure out why I don’t feed them earlier. I do, sometimes. My SO hate the smell of the food (we call it “Stinky Stuff”!) so he has to have gone down to the Family Room for the remainder of the evening after dinner before they get fed. So, they follow me around, giving me the ‘evil eye’ and meowing because I haven’t fed them, yet. So, they think I’m crazy because I do things other than feed them.
Cookie has a fairly accurate clock in her tummy; although it tends to run faster the closer it gets to feeding time. They get fed at 10:00PM, more or less, so I call it her 10:00 Tummy. She has also been known to wake me up in the morning if I should fall back asleep after the alarm goes off. She gets up on the bed and meows in my face to wake me up.
Wonderful way to start the day! A face-full of cat-breath! But my “4-footed alarm clock” has come in handy a few times! Some days, I can sleep through anything! Except a 12 lb. cat standing on me, yelling in my face. That usually gets my attention!! And then I’m only a few minutes late for work instead of the hours that it would be if it were up to me. Not a good way to stay employed! Bosses like you there when they want you there.
In addition, I think my cats think I spend all day in the garage. Well, after all, I go into that room in the morning and come out of it in the evenings. They never really try to get out there. I suspect it smells nasty to them: I park my car in my garage. Cars smell nasty to me; I can’t imagine they smell nice to cats: gasoline, oil, various fluids and all that plastic. Plus, when I had to have my very old and very sick put to sleep this summer, Cissy went into the garage and never came back out! I think they noticed. Klein seems almost afraid of it!
This is all to the good, as far an I’m concerned. The last thing I need to do when I’m on my way to work is play Chase-the-Kitty out in the garage! Cissy did that once and I had to wash her feet as she got into some oil leaked onto the floor by an old car I used to have. She didn’t like that one little bit!! Gave me that hurt look for days!
I used to trim her nails when they got too sharp. She was a very good sport about it and never fought me. Although, she would often leave to go and wash her feet to make sure she still had all her toes, carefully licking them one at a time. You could imagine the monolog in her head: Onnnnnne… Yep, this one’s still here. Twooooooooo…..Yup, the next one’s here, too. Threeeeee……….Yup, this one’s OK as well.
Well, if cats could think in English, that is!!
They’re probably right. After all, who gets up at the crack of dawn to go sit in an office all day to earn money for cat food (and other things!) and who gets to stay home and sleep all day?? If life were fair, it would be the other way around!
But, who said life was fair? I don’t even like that word. It’s the ultimate whine from spoiled children who aren’t getting their way; “No fair!” I always asked them to explain their frame of reference, not letting them get away with simply stating that they wanted their way in something. Why was their way better than mine? Explain yourself!! Who says?
Anyway, back to the cats…
Cookie and Klein (named by children, is case you couldn’t tell!), get a can of cat food every night before I go to bed. As a result, Cookie won’t let me out of her sight unless and until they are fed. I’ve gone to bed early a couple of time without feeding them and she’s never forgotten it, nor forgiven me. So, if I leave the kitchen, she follows me. If I go upstairs, she follows me and gives me that “Mommy doesn’t love me anymore” look until I go back downstairs. Or she panics and tries to block me from going up the stairs. Of course, I’m probably just going to get something and step right over her. A 12 lb. cat just isn’t capable of physically blocking my path to any great degree. Or I step on her, resulting in much yelling and hurt looks and apologies from me, even though it was her that got in my way.
So, any place I go in my house in the evenings after dinner requires a 2 cat entourage, just to make sure that I don’t get away without feeding them their treat. They also can’t figure out why I don’t feed them earlier. I do, sometimes. My SO hate the smell of the food (we call it “Stinky Stuff”!) so he has to have gone down to the Family Room for the remainder of the evening after dinner before they get fed. So, they follow me around, giving me the ‘evil eye’ and meowing because I haven’t fed them, yet. So, they think I’m crazy because I do things other than feed them.
Cookie has a fairly accurate clock in her tummy; although it tends to run faster the closer it gets to feeding time. They get fed at 10:00PM, more or less, so I call it her 10:00 Tummy. She has also been known to wake me up in the morning if I should fall back asleep after the alarm goes off. She gets up on the bed and meows in my face to wake me up.
Wonderful way to start the day! A face-full of cat-breath! But my “4-footed alarm clock” has come in handy a few times! Some days, I can sleep through anything! Except a 12 lb. cat standing on me, yelling in my face. That usually gets my attention!! And then I’m only a few minutes late for work instead of the hours that it would be if it were up to me. Not a good way to stay employed! Bosses like you there when they want you there.
In addition, I think my cats think I spend all day in the garage. Well, after all, I go into that room in the morning and come out of it in the evenings. They never really try to get out there. I suspect it smells nasty to them: I park my car in my garage. Cars smell nasty to me; I can’t imagine they smell nice to cats: gasoline, oil, various fluids and all that plastic. Plus, when I had to have my very old and very sick put to sleep this summer, Cissy went into the garage and never came back out! I think they noticed. Klein seems almost afraid of it!
This is all to the good, as far an I’m concerned. The last thing I need to do when I’m on my way to work is play Chase-the-Kitty out in the garage! Cissy did that once and I had to wash her feet as she got into some oil leaked onto the floor by an old car I used to have. She didn’t like that one little bit!! Gave me that hurt look for days!
I used to trim her nails when they got too sharp. She was a very good sport about it and never fought me. Although, she would often leave to go and wash her feet to make sure she still had all her toes, carefully licking them one at a time. You could imagine the monolog in her head: Onnnnnne… Yep, this one’s still here. Twooooooooo…..Yup, the next one’s here, too. Threeeeee……….Yup, this one’s OK as well.
Well, if cats could think in English, that is!!
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